Change is a process of being honest with myself. I resist change when I don't want to be with my experience or accept the truth. I go into denial by resisting emotions and evacuating. It seems so much easier to try to justify mediocrity. Maybe mediocrity means existing and going through life doing the same things that don’t make us happy over and over again and wondering "what if"?

I don't think any person is exempt from change, or fear. I've realized I do have a choice in whether or not I will be fear's slave or make the changes in my life for my happiness. I seriously have no soapbox to stand on and I am no professional at working with fear, but I am grateful for those in my life who have helped me notice mediocrity symptoms. Noticing when I'm "recoiling" (as I like to call it) is something I've only realized in the past four or five months. This ability really surfaced after my time working with a life coach.

Honoring my feelings and myself has been one of the most difficult and important things for me to learn, because it was not my "normal". Digging my feet in ground and pushing forward, because I’m worth it, feels damn good.

-Josh