I experience God most fully when I am willing to be in the unknown.

I will never forget a brief interaction I had with a friend at a conference six years ago. I was listening to some people share about their beliefs in a way that I was really struggling to connect with. I was honestly getting pretty critical and a bit judgmental. I approached my friend and said some kind of short remark to get my feelings off my chest. He looked at me and all he said was, “Where is God in this?”. This moment forever transformed the way I look at my experiences and world.

God is not limited by our abilities, but we are limited by our unwillingness to listen, stay, and look for God in the unfamiliar.

Surrender to the present moment is only possible when we forfeit our habit of self-importance. It doesn’t pay in the easy/cheap way we’re used to because the present moment doesn’t add to us, it awakens us. Being with God is to experience what it means to be fully human.

I believe I needed to learn how to let myself be held before I could gain the awareness of what it means to be with God. Being with someone is not an act of grasping or consumption, but of giving and sharing. Love is the dance we are in. Love calls us beyond with the pure motivation of offering us a precious gift, true intimacy. Love offers us true understanding. True love shows us we are fully known and loved as we are, right now.

This kind of talk always sounded fluffy and nice before I learned how to deeply trust and feel safe in relationships. I realize the world wasn’t waiting for me to “fix it” to fit my understanding of myself, the world was waiting for me to let myself be transformed so I could appreciate what it has to offer.

-Josh